What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
