1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
