So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
