I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
