I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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