I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
