dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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