hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
