Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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