He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
