I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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