oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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