All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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