yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Randomize
