ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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