Christians are straight up FREAKS
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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