I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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