yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
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