"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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