And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
