how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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