You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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