at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
