my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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