just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
May the power of my ass compel you!!
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