google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize
