I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
