I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
