a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
They are going to name an STD after you.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
