oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
