More tranny stories later!
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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