I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
