New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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