God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
