Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
