Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
