My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize