i would punch a child for taco bell
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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