i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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