mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
