I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Randomize
