It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Randomize