I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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