I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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