Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize