Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
