i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
