I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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