im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
this just has baby written all over it
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
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