we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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