i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
There r osticjed everywhere
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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